Fisayo Speak's

Saying No can be a good thing

by Měilìfisayo

Hello my lovelies, Hope you are well? As an individual I know you have been told ‘No’ several times in your life; from your parents, job hunting, asking for favors, etc.

And as a fellow person like yourself who has been on the receiving end of this same word too, I know it can be brutal to take in and it makes you feel awful. I don’t know about you but some people feel like saying ‘Yes’ to try and contract this sort of energy is going to make up for that but in reality, it stresses you out and stretch you thin. However, before you say No to a task you first need to ask yourself a few questions;

  1. Do I really want to do this?
  2.  What do I gain from doing this?
  3. What else can I be doing with my time if I don’t take this task on?

This three questions will help make your decision easier even though you will feel awkward or guilty after you anticipate how the person will react to your response. But be prepared for the backlash if they are family or friends. Some people out of FOMO (Fear-of -missing-out)  will eventually say Yes but here are a few benefits of saying NO.

Power to be in control of your time

By saying no to a task definitely gives you total control of your own time and take the power off the person giving you the task proving that you are not a pushover or a people-pleasing person and that can gain you respect.

Time to do whatever you want

You saying no give creates time to do other things or to just chill out in the comfort of your home; ain’t nothing wrong with that though.

Builds your confidence

Although, doing this for the first time will be hard but in the long run you start to build your confidence and people around you start to see that you are not a pushover.

On a real note too much No can isolate you and create a negative persona so you want to be careful too not lose connection with people who can help you in the future or lose the opportunity in the future. Finding a balance between yes and no is the key which can only exist if you see the positive and the negative sides before saying No an also another way is to check with your gut as that will never fail you.

FYI: I have a YouTube Channel now and if you want to check me out click here

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Meilifisayo xxxx

28 thoughts on “Saying No can be a good thing”

  1. I totally agree. Saying yes always takes so much energy when it’s not something you really want to do. I like those three questions to think about whether or not to say yes or no.

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  4. I think I spent my early 20’s (and before) always saying yes, and allowing people to walk all over me including people I thought was my friend and was supposed to be my family. I think a lot of those things were stepping stones for me to open my eyes to me to be able to start saying no. Saying no is so important, especially for our mental health and when you know someone is using you because it can weigh on you. I know now I do still at times say yes to things I want to say no to, but none of those people were using me so I don’t feel that bad about it even if it was time wasted.

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    1. thank you for reading babes. As long as you can justify the task and go with it’s cool. I still say yes to things I don’t want to do but I see it as spending quality time with the person as well which can be fun hehe

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  5. I enjoy saying no and with practice I’ve gotten better at it. sometimes I may feel bad but eventually it pass. People will take and take from you until you have nothing left to give to yourself.

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  8. Saying no is a good thing to practice; if all you say is yes, you will begin to find yourself feeling bullied or as if you have no power. That is how I felt, and I felt a little bad for saying no when I first started out saying it, but it is a good to put yourself first; it does help confidence!

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  9. Crazy thing reading this article….I just finished writing my draft and it is all about saying….lol. I agree 100%….yet it is difficult for some people to say no….not me….I have gotten so much better over the years and learned.

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  11. I’ve gotta do this formyself. Half the time im saying yes to things because I feel bad even though i dont want to do them. Then the things I say no to are the things that could be giving me new experiences and I’m just scared. I need a healthy middle ground.

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